Monday, June 9, 2014

3 Ways to Build Self Esteem

Self Esteem: Confidence in one's own worth or abilities; self-respect.

We've all experienced life's ups and downs, and we've all felt world shattering blows to our confidence and self perception. Personally, I have rarely felt more clear and exhilarated than I felt in the moment I realized that I was 100% responsible for my life circumstances, how I was treated and how I felt about myself. In that moment everything changed. I felt powerful and alive, no longer making excuses for myself or others, and no longer playing the victim role. Once I understood that I alone was in charge of showing myself and others what I was worth and how much I valued me, my whole reality shifted for the better. I guess that's why it's called SELF esteem; YOU are in charge of it. Here are three ways to improve your self esteem and in turn your relationships and your life. 

1. Surround yourself with positive people

"You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with" - Jim Rohn. 
Constantly complaining about friends, family and coworkers? Maybe it's time to look in the mirror if the people you associate with most are negative, insecure energy drainers, because chances are good that their outlook has rubbed off on you. When you are around positive people, you can't help but become more positive, happy and full of life, so eliminate or limit your time spent with people who you don't feel great around. 

2. Set achievable goals

When you have confidence in your ability to do things, you are more likely to accomplish more. So set daily and monthly goals. Start with small goals such as "clean out two kitchen drawers" or " jog for 1 extra minute each day". Pretty soon you will have the confidence to set larger goals because that's how self esteem works; the more you feed it the more it can eat, and the more self confident you become. 

3. Be happy with you just as you are in every moment. 

Creating self esteem isn't just about doing and achieving more, rather, it's about creating a balance between accepting who you are and being who you want to become. Be gentle on yourself more often. Learn to love who you are. When you are bashing yourself for who you are or a mistake you've made, ask yourself this simple question: how would I respond to my best friend if they did the same thing? This will allow for more self compassion, which will boost your self esteem. 
Jennifer Szabo
Certified Wellness Counselor
Certified Life Coach
Licensed Zumba Fitness Instructor

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